The following poems were first published between 2009 and 2010, though some of them were written in 2008.
1. A
Voice in the Night
The
tumult of day
recedes
into evening,
a
curtain of calm
descending
at last,
warding
off the noise
that
distracts me;
time
at last to think,
time
to be me.
I
release that voice
kept
hidden inside,
listen
to its fears,
and
fear its doubts:
perhaps
I dream too much,
perhaps
not enough,
and
perhaps my nightmares
will
never see the light.
In
these quiet moments,
I
find myself reflected
in
your distant face,
recognize
your dreams
as
shadows of my own,
and
I pray that your fears
recede
into evening
so
those dreams may soar.
2. Acceptance
I
know who I am,
the
brief part I play
in
the grim tragedy
we
call existence;
I
see no perfection,
assume
no role
as
judge and jury,
no
righteous rage,
no
condemnation
of
human flaws.
I
seek inner peace
in
a time of turmoil,
when
too much pain
overshadows
life,
creating
a winter
that
knows no end
to
the storms it inflicts.
So
I shelter my soul,
simply
awaiting the light
that
offers release.
3. Across
the Sea
Across
the sea, so far away,
in
a land where music flows
like
a stream into the ocean,
a
land where storied breezes blow
and
the sun spreads golden rays,
there
lives a sage, a man of song,
whose
music will bring solace
to
a soul that struggles long
to
find its place upon the earth.
A
man of joy, a man of peace,
who,
like the magic bards of old,
will
make our sorrows cease;
as
we listen to the Siren call
that
sounds within our ears,
no
grief will strike our battered hearts,
no
pain will bring forth tears.
For
this one man will ever be
the
stranger who reached out to me.
4. Across
the Void
Carved
by eternity, it stood
immobile,
a canyon too deep,
a
gulf between two solitudes
that
would be one.
Alone
on one side she sought
some
way to overcome the gap,
and
rest in joy beside him
when
day was done.
His
heart, reaching out to her,
yearned
for a bridge between cliffs,
a
secret passage to prevent
love
destroyed.
Two
souls, conceived so far apart,
refused
to give in to despair,
for
what is love but a reaching out
across
the void?
5. After
the Storm
Rain
loudly pounding on the roof
at
last diminishes into showers,
a
gentle rain that nourishes the earth
as
it warms to the call of spring;
water
from heaven, bringing life,
marking
the end of dark winter,
promising
the blaze of summer.
In
newfound peace I lie with you,
safely
enclosed in your embrace --
you
are my haven in fair wind or foul,
you
offer me shelter, keep me anchored
in
a world I cannot fully understand,
where
I would ever drift in darkness
if
not for your presence after the storm.
6. Anagnorisis
Can you feel the pain,
now understand the hurt
of words spoken in haste,
with no thought given
to the power they exert?
Words like daggers
cut deep into the heart,
leaving fatal scars,
the death of love;
words like poison
burn in the blood,
incinerating the soul.
The immortality of words,
once written, once said,
never to be erased,
and never forgotten;
too late to heal now,
no miracle waiting
to salvage the past --
only recognition.
7. Another Rainy Day: Barometer Down, Summer 2009
Clouds
taint the sky,
never-ending
rain,
incessant
drumming
chilling
my bones,
lifeblood
of the earth
drowning
my soul
as
I thirst for the sun,
despair
in the dark.
Hunched
into myself,
I
ford young rivers
running
to the sea,
ignoring
my presence,
determined
only to meet
Mother
Ocean’s foam,
lost
children returning,
havoc
in their wake.
Contagious
gloom infects
a
city losing strength,
sickened
by storms,
crippled
by winds;
I
too feel diseased,
weak
and delirious,
praying
to survive
yet
another rainy day.
8. Apollo
8. Apollo
The
Greek god strikes a handsome pose:
a
golden cloak billowing out behind him,
thick
locks of hair cascading around his face;
ever
youthful, he strides with divine confidence,
brings
the light of the Sun against Darkness,
encourages
the treasured gifts of the Muses –
god
of the dance, god of the lyre,
the
ever perfect son of Zeus on high.
This
very image of ancient beauty,
this
consummate creation of the mythic mind,
this
god of light was also the god of plague,
crushing
good and evil alike under a hand
poised
to dispense death and disease;
those
who perished at his touch did not see
how
beautiful was the face which erased
their
lives in one brutal movement.
9. Ariadne
on Naxos
No
one ever heard them –
the
words that she screamed
when
nightfall descended
into
desperate dreams,
when
hope lay forsaken
in
the well of lost days,
and
courage meandered
through
a minotaur maze.
No
heroes came forward
with
balm for her grief,
she
hid in the darkness
like
a penitent thief
till
she had no words left
to
hurl at the winds,
in
silence she yielded
to
the demon within.
10. As Christmas Ends
10. As Christmas Ends
A
quiet moment,
late
at night,
time
to reflect
on
my blessings,
for
being loved
despite
my flaws,
and
loving you,
the
dark stranger
who
brought light
in
his heart.
Not
long ago
I
felt despair –
how
life seemed
an
empty vessel
bestowed
on me
in
mocking laughter;
but
this chalice
your
love filled,
making
me whole,
giving
me hope.
11. As
Winter Ends
Bitter
cold recedes,
a
glacial retreat
as
days become longer
and
the dark gives way
to
a new and hopeful light.
Winter
defeats me:
I
seek hibernation,
the
sleeping of the soul,
escape
from dogs of ice;
but
the first warmth
of
Spring awakens in me
the
desire to dance,
to
celebrate the return
of
the life-giving Sun.
The day dawns bright,
The day dawns bright,
bringing
a new hope
that
the dance I begin
will
end in exultation,
that
Winter is once more
nothing
but a frozen memory.
12. At
4 AM
Sleep
has abandoned me --
in
the dark before dawn
I
sit and listen to sounds
of
the world stirring
in
anticipation of light;
the
stars remain fixed
for
my eyes to gaze upon,
the
sea is a clear mirror
for
all of Creation.
I
think back on yesterday,
on
all my yesterdays,
in
agonizing hindsight;
“if
only”, “what if” resound
in
a mind tired of sorrow,
seeking
a way to escape
the
labyrinth that holds me
lost
and wandering in circles,
never
finding lasting rest.
Then
I look again skyward,
the
stars that burn so bright
imprinting
themselves on me,
so
ancient while I am so young –
how
many other sleepless eyes
have
they looked down upon,
how
many other troubled hearts
have
they seen break and die?
In
the face of the Universe
I
am nothing, a speck of dust,
soon
to be reduced to atoms,
and
then I shall sleep well.
13. At
Seventeen
At
seventeen you knew the game
that
life forced you to play,
you
knew the rules and penalties,
yet
played the game your way;
so
what if others laughed at you,
or
thought you played the fool --
deep
within your heart you found
lessons
never learned at school:
that
love was to be treasured,
the
gift of God to human souls,
that
strength of mind was paramount,
and
would lead you to your goals.
Against
the dark you stood your ground,
rejecting
those who made you feel
that
asking questions was unwise,
that
only what they thought was real;
the
path you chose could not be smooth,
but
fraught with dangers still unseen,
yet
watching how you made your way
made
me proud of you at seventeen.
14. Autumn
Winds
Howling,
swirling around
like
frenzied Bacchants,
biting
into my flesh
as
if a sacrificial offering,
demanding
obeisance
with
insistent blows,
autumn
winds remind me
that
winter’s god lies near,
Dionysus
of the Snows
driving
the light away,
preparing
white blankets
to
cover my soul –
the
time of ever slowing,
the
dark hibernation
inflicted
on those like me,
we
who worship Apollo
even
as he abandons us
to
the fist of November.
15. Baiting the Bear
19. Beloved
15. Baiting the Bear
They
hate you for existing,
consider
you not worthy
to
wear the crown of life
and
dance in the light.
A
stain lies upon you,
the
mark of the leper --
they
cry out ‘unclean’
as
you slowly pass by.
You
try to ignore them
though
anger fills you,
you
try to be invisible
in
the face of their wrath.
You
know they are few,
their
hatred well countered
by
the love you receive
from
more gentle hearts.
Let
them bait the bear,
provoke
you to anger –
you
must not lash out,
you
must instead forgive.
16. Bayside Cottage
16. Bayside Cottage
Hidden
away, deep in the forest,
a
cottage awakens from slumber:
its
roof clatters anew with the feet
of
birds now returning to the north,
ready
to nest again in the spruce;
around
its walls red squirrels play
and
stake their private territories;
the
nearby bay has finally lost
the
ice cap that it reluctantly wore
during
the dark months of hibernation.
The
long-idled boats are waking too,
ready
to sail for another season,
eager
to ride the gentle waves;
soon
flowers will bring forth buds
and
begin to carpet the ground
with
myriad colours and forms.
The
lonely bush is alive at last,
the
harsh pall of Winter gone;
it
sings an ode to Summer joys,
and
beckons me to set my foot
where
my heart is once more free,
resounding
to the powerful beat
of
Nature reborn, of Life itself
celebrating
this humble patch of bush.
17. Before
You
Let
me tell you a story
of
life before you,
when
everything withered
and
nothing was new –
imagine
a flower
encased
all in weeds,
with
no power to blossom,
no
scatter of seeds;
or
conjure up sunsets
seen
by no eye,
their
glory unnoticed
and
destined to die;
a
song never sung,
a
poem never read,
existing
in shadows
where
sadness is bred;
no
hope of salvation
in
a world growing dark,
a
world without beauty,
a
world with no spark.
This
was my life
before
you appeared,
a
sheltered existence
with
life itself feared;
but
you took my hand,
and
captured my soul
by
offering love
and
making me whole;
a
chrysalis burst
to
see the world new,
and
all that it took
was
the presence of you.
18. Being
There
There
at night,
in
the silence
of
the dark,
you
come to me
like
magic –
a
smile arising
where
pain had been,
a
heart in tune
with
my own.
And
if at night,
in
the same silence
I
can ease your mind,
I
shall also smile.
North
and south,
reaching
out in hope,
soul
unto soul,
so
much in common,
reaching
out in love.
19. Beloved
In
his arms there is no sorrow,
memories
of the day recede
as
if a veil has descended,
and
I am safe.
His
touch leads me into midnight,
a
gentle guide that understands
the
terror that can seize my soul
without
warning.
With
his kiss nothing else matters:
the
universe could fall away,
the
fabric of existence shred,
I
would not care.
I
become one with him in soul,
each
a mirror of the other,
each
unwilling to move away,
to
be apart.
For
him I would deny all else,
ignore
the menacing darkness,
for
he reminds me every night
that
I am loved.
20. Blank Paper
20. Blank Paper
An
accusing, silent stare,
the
urgent need for words
inscribed
upon your surface,
absorbing
each letter
like
thirsty summer soil;
if
only I had words –
new
words, hopeful words
to
make you smile,
even
words of sorrow
that
make you weep.
How
I caress each word,
a
sudden, divine gift
I
never hoped to receive --
no
longer am I mute,
unheard,
unseen;
yet
our love is dangerous,
for
as I hold you close
you
reveal too much,
the
ultimate betrayal
blank
paper demand.
21. Blessed
Solitude
Too
many voices are drowning
my
senses in meaningless chatter,
a
Tower of Babel stands where
ears
are assaulted by endless noise.
Escape:
I seek the blessed solitude
of
the forest by the lonely sea
which
time has gently passed by;
voices
of Nature soothe my ears,
make
tranquil my tormented soul.
A
small cottage on a quiet shore
calls
to me, singing a melody
like
that of the Sirens of old;
but
I fear no shipwreck there:
the
Sirens of this place are gracious,
bestowing
long awaited peace.
Yes,
this world is too much with us,
so
the poet once proclaimed --
I
must leave before I am consumed.
22. Blood
on the Ground
She
was minding her business,
looking
after her stuff,
when
you came along
and
got really rough –
you
bashed her up good,
and
told her she’s crap,
you
may as well rape her
and
call it a wrap;
but
the fault was all hers,
because
she was there,
the
handiest target
for
a bully to scare.
She
really deserved it
for
being a broad
who
stood up to you,
you
wanna-be god;
and
yes, you’re the victor,
you’ll
get away clean,
and
brag to your buddies
about
being so mean;
it’s
such fun being violent
with
no cops around,
so
just let her lie there,
her
blood on the ground.
23. Broken
Heart
He
stood in the rain,
impervious
to the chill,
deaf
to the traffic
passing
him by;
alone
in his new world,
a
world without her,
inconceivable
thought,
unimaginable
loss.
Defeated
by darkness,
his
tears one with the rain,
lamenting
an emptiness
like
none ever known;
he
felt nothing now,
and
all he heard
was
the muted sound
of
a broken heart.
24. By
My Side
I
may never sail the stars
or
hold a rainbow in my hand,
but
even on the darkest day
I
see the beauty of this land.
I
may never grasp a floating cloud
or
dance with angels high above,
but
even when my aim falls short
I
am supported by your love.
And
even when the night is long,
the
moon a crescent in the sky,
no
regrets will seize my soul
as
long as you are by my side.
25. Catharsis
She
could only smile for so long,
repressing
anger deep within,
trying
to prevent its explosion
by
putting on a comic mask.
Ignition
must come in the end,
triggered
by some word or deed
that
reopens festering wounds,
makes
her remember the things
she
has tried so hard to forget.
To
reveal her torment to others
is
not easy: no one wants to hear
the
tragic song that brings unease.
Yet
philosophers spoke of catharsis --
the
cleansing of the soul achieved
by
the recognition of angry reality;
her
pent up wrath released in song,
the
spirit now at last returns to rest,
the
comic mask again upon her face.
26. Catharsis of the Soul
Chaos
rules the world
and
infects our minds,
madness
all around us,
erasing
voices of sanity.
I
try to make sense
of
the feelings within me --
the
fierce rage of anger,
the
sad longing for love --
but
all I have are words:
words
created by the pen
that
rests in my hand,
ever
waiting to sing aloud
like
the cruel Sirens of old.
Yet
these powerful words
bring
not fatal destruction,
but
a catharsis of my soul,
purging
my roiling emotions
and
freeing me from fear –
the
fear of ultimate exposure
as
I unveil myself to you;
deny
the power of the poem
and
I walk again in Chaos.
27. Celebration
Time
has brought another summer,
fragrant
with the smell of flowers
escaping
the confining earth,
free
to greet the growing sun;
I
celebrate this resurrection,
light
from winter’s darkness,
a
world reborn once more,
the
fear of death cast off.
We
join hands to take part
in
the dance of life triumphant ,
each
knowing that our love
has
banished ice-fed demons;
and
when the seasons turn again,
and
the sunlight starts to dim,
we
shall cherish this moment,
our
sacred affirmation of love.
28. Christmas Eve on the Streets
The old man lives in a cardboard house,
collecting soiled newspapers for warmth,
and stares at the woman with a shopping cart
who looks for cigarette butts on the sidewalk;
across the street the junkie kid juices up,
the dull and dirty needle violating her flesh,
while a thug with no name flicks his knife,
hoping a stranger will take a wrong turn tonight.
On the other side of town, Christmas lights blaze
as last minute shoppers open their wallets
to buy yet another superfluous gadget,
ignoring the woman at the Sally Ann kettle;
from a church joyous hymns are heard,
voices praising God for the gift of His Son,
repeating the glad tidings of so long ago
while contemplating tomorrow's sumptuous feast.
An lone man, almost invisible in his black coat,
walks from one side of town to the other,
takes the abuse of the angry schizophrenic
with no money or will to treat his disease,
listens to the cliched wishes of the well-to-do
for peace on earth and good will to everyone,
while poverty and war overrun the planet,
and begs His Father to forgive them all.
29. Civil War
28. Christmas Eve on the Streets
The old man lives in a cardboard house,
collecting soiled newspapers for warmth,
and stares at the woman with a shopping cart
who looks for cigarette butts on the sidewalk;
across the street the junkie kid juices up,
the dull and dirty needle violating her flesh,
while a thug with no name flicks his knife,
hoping a stranger will take a wrong turn tonight.
On the other side of town, Christmas lights blaze
as last minute shoppers open their wallets
to buy yet another superfluous gadget,
ignoring the woman at the Sally Ann kettle;
from a church joyous hymns are heard,
voices praising God for the gift of His Son,
repeating the glad tidings of so long ago
while contemplating tomorrow's sumptuous feast.
An lone man, almost invisible in his black coat,
walks from one side of town to the other,
takes the abuse of the angry schizophrenic
with no money or will to treat his disease,
listens to the cliched wishes of the well-to-do
for peace on earth and good will to everyone,
while poverty and war overrun the planet,
and begs His Father to forgive them all.
29. Civil War
A
savage battle rages deep,
a
civil war tearing me apart,
two
souls in a single body --
one
is straining towards light,
rejoicing
in love, reaching out
to
grasp the hands of others
extended
in gentle friendship;
the
other dwells in darkness,
always
despairing of tomorrow,
always
hiding far from those
who
cannot comprehend
the
fierce struggle taking place.
This
dark soul finds life in death,
peace
in dissolution of the flesh --
I
stand on a twisting balance,
battered
by these hostile forces,
praying
to see the battle end
but
ever fearful of the victor.
30. Coming
Home
You
gave me the wings
to
travel far away,
the
courage to venture
to
places unknown;
you
set me on the path
to
find out who I am,
chrysalis
emerging
into
a woman grown.
You
tended me with love,
not
falling back in fear
or
rejecting the seed
so
imperfectly sown;
wherever
fortune leads,
whatever
fate intends,
I
am forever grateful,
and
always coming home.
31. Contradiction
Contradiction
personified,
hiding
so much anger,
holding
so much love,
sometimes
her silence
brings
me terror,
and
I fear she is lost;
then
she laughs
and
the clouds break,
I
see a glimpse of her
that
enchants me.
I
may never know
who
she really is,
but
it matters not:
she
has claimed
a
place in my heart,
and
will remain there.
32. Conversation
A
stonemason and a carpenter
met
one day along a winding road,
both
knowing well the lasting pain
of
hearts that bear a heavy load,
and
each a man in search of peace
in
times when anger ruled all souls,
despairing
of the wicked wrath
that
turned men from their gentle goals,
that
caused the Good to flee the earth
and
Love to shroud its head in pain
as
mankind turned its back on hope
and
fell to sin in search of gain.
They
talked of torment they had known –
the
hemlock and the wooden cross –
how
what they taught was pushed aside
by
those who wandered weak and lost,
yet
each had faith the time would come
when
evil hearts would pass away,
and
so did one pull out his nails
as
one set down his cup of clay.
33. Crossroads
Our
lives exist at crossroads:
the
paths we choose are random,
uncertain,
filled with dangers
we
cannot even imagine.
Yet
not to choose means death:
we
make the choice and move on,
hoping
Time will grant us grace;
but
on that fearful journey
never
forget to love,
to
reach out to other pilgrims,
to
say I forgive you, and,
at
last, find rest in silent peace.
34. Cry
in the Night
I
hear your voice
cry
out in pain,
lamenting
what life
has
done to you,
never
ending turmoil,
never
enough time
to
enjoy the sunlight,
to
run wild in the rain.
You
seek escape --
a
tranquil place
where
you are free
simply
to exist:
no
more demands,
no
more torment,
just
the peace of being
and
the joy of silence.
I
wish I could give you
the
life you deserve,
the
solace you seek;
I
wish I could tell you
all
will be well in time,
your
dreams come true;
but
all I can offer is love,
my
cry joined with yours.
35. Damaged
The
power of words:
the
precision of lasers
focussed
on the heart,
burning
into fragments
what
had been whole;
and
you, the surgeon,
in
cold arrogance
disdaining
the patient
as
unworthy of your skill.
The
power of words:
once
spoken, ever present,
and
indelibly inscribed
forever
on the soul,
a
mocking reminder
of
one’s imperfection,
relegating
to darkness
the
rose broken by life,
damaged
by thorns.
36. Dare
to Dream
The
ghosts of my past
chase
sleep away,
leaving
me restless
as
dawn creeps in;
a
sliver of sunlight
captures
my eyes --
an
image of hope,
promise
of new days?
Why
dream of tomorrow
when
darkness is still close,
and
thoughts of yesterday
refuse
to leave my mind?
Trapped
in the past,
unable
to break free,
held
by invisible chains
to
never-fading images;
no
hope lies there:
if
I seek freedom,
I
must banish my ghosts
and
dare to dream today.
37. Darkness
and Dreams
The
contradictions of life snare us all:
into
webs of purest silk, strong and fatal,
we
pour our darkness and our dreams.
When
the heart is clouded with pain
no
light can ease the torment:
all
we see are nightmares of the soul,
condemning
us to suffer without end.
Yet
nightmares are but dreams awry,
dreams
that turn on us in anger;
regain
the dream, find the light
that
lives even in the blackest cloud.
Darkness
and dreams, complementary
and
contradictive, make us human,
lead
us on the paths we travel;
they
are companions on the journey,
they
are the journey itself.
38. Daydream
I
push the world aside,
weary
of the noise
buffeting
my ears,
the
senseless babble
of
a million voices;
I
send my mind away
on
a far-flung cosmic quest,
the
wonder of Creation
calling
out to my soul,
a
promise of eternal peace.
I
gaze at stars transcendent,
galaxies
that pirouette
to
music never heard before,
and
my ears are cleansed
in
this divine libation;
if
only I could remain here,
orbiting
a nascent star,
with
you alone beside me,
binary
souls set free at last
to
dance in loving harmony.
39. December
6, 1917: The Day Halifax Died: In Memoriam
War
raged,
but
far away,
in
distant lands
across
the sea,
where
men died
and
lay unburied
in
fields of mud;
news
came home
of
brothers dead,
sons
no more to love,
husbands
gassed,
lungs
on fire.
But
Halifax was safe,
life
struggled on
despite
the loss
each
family mourned,
until
two ships met
in
a fatal embrace
within
the harbour
and
the city fell,
erased
from earth
in
a mere second,
as
if some giant foot
had
crushed its bones.
The
survivors emerged
into
mangled ruins,
the
war come home
in
ways unimaginable;
schools
vanished,
hospitals
burning,
corpses
heaped up
for
rapid burial.
Yet,
from these ruins,
arose
a Phoenix –
leaving
ash behind
but
never forgotten.
40. December
Blight
December
falls upon the land,
a
curtain drawn by an unseen hand,
too
swift the sunlight disappears
to
leave behind souls crushed by fears;
in
darkness monsters claw the heart
as
hopeful dreams haste to depart,
and
nurture only nightmares doomed
to
trace our steps from room to room.
December
seeps into the ground,
a
poison with no elixir found,
and
those infected must endure
a
pain that knows no human cure;
and
so we wait with eyes downcast,
abiding
each new blow and blast,
till
January’s healing light
puts
an end to December blight.
41. December Song
The
dying year brings darkness,
the
fevered chill of icy gales,
rain
that falls in endless storms
to
make the human spirit fail.
But
in the dark skies high above,
far
constellations offer light,
the
promise that rebirth is near
fills
the gloom of this winter night.
The
month to dawn brings solace:
behold
a new year reaching out
to
clasp our hearts in joy reborn
and
banish soul-destroying doubt.
The
light of life will soon return
and
bring new growth upon the land,
and,
as the seasons make their round,
God
will hold us in His hand.
42. Delusion
I
once thought you kind:
even
in your confusion
I
sensed a gentle soul
lying
dormant within,
a
tree awaiting spring
to
embrace life again.
The
hurtful things you said
I
came to brush aside,
assign
them to ignorance
of
the power of words;
forgiveness
came easy
when
I thought you kind.
But
now I see you clearly,
embracer
of the dark,
and
perceive why you hide;
and
so I take my leave,
for
I now know better
than
to love delusion.
43. Disguise
You
try so hard to smile,
to
stop the tears from flowing,
to
pretend that all is well.
You
paint a grin upon your face,
dress
yourself in brightest hues,
so
vibrant that no one call tell
how
much your heart is breaking,
or
how deep the wounds you suffer;
they
cannot understand the pain
or
feel the emptiness inside,
that
gnawing, hungry beast
that
turns you to the Dark once more.
You
reach out for a hand to grasp,
someone
to lead you from the edge
where
you stand alone and wonder
if
the sun will ever shine for you,
or
if the fragile craft you sail
will
stay afloat another day.
44. Divided
Soul
You entered my life in silence,
Part
of her speaks softly,
freely
offers an embrace,
but
part of her is eager
to
spit into your face,
a
Janus in her spirit
will
never let her sleep,
taunting
her each evening
with
dreams beyond her keep;
at
times I think I know her
and
hold her in my heart,
until
the Janus reappears
and
tears her mind apart,
so
all I have are fragments
and
not a living whole,
yet
never shall I turn away
from
this divided soul.
45. Dragon (Eclipse)
A
dragon creeps
above
my head
as
I gaze upon
a
startled orb,
her
serene face
now
in danger
of
being burned
by
fiery breath.
Once,
in ages past,
this
hungry beast
foretold
sorrows
beyond
imagination:
drought
and disease,
towers
thrown down
and
cities laid waste,
death
to innocents.
Now
telescopes peer
as
a carnival unfolds,
a
spectacle for those
who
banish dragons,
while
growing darkness
devours
my soul,
reflecting
the beast
that
creeps within.
46. Dream
Big
So
much lies ahead –
the
world unfolding
like
a nascent flower
in
spring’s warm embrace,
the
chill of winter gone.
Greet
each day with hope,
celebrate
your existence
and
smile at the future,
for,
whatever the pain,
there
will also be joy
and
love awaiting you.
Be
patient, sleep well,
and,
always and ever,
let
your dreams be big.
47. Dreams and Desperation
47. Dreams and Desperation
You entered my life in silence,
emerging
from the shadows
cast
by curtains of the mind,
desire
fulfilled.
Alive
within me, but still a ghost,
now
free to haunt my soul,
one
I loved but could not hold,
denied
existence.
A
pilgrim lost in desert sands
might
pray for one like you –
water
to quench his growing thirst,
saviour
oasis.
Born
of dreams and desperation –
how
I reach to feel your flesh,
then
recoil into dark reality,
hopeless
mirage.
48. Drifting
In
the dark of night
your
sorrows grow,
to
seize your heart
so
hard you know
that
peace is lost,
you
sail alone
adrift
in despair,
no
anchor stone
to
hold you fast;
fierce
winds arise
ripping
your sails,
salt
in your eyes,
tears
of the lover;
but
all storms end,
their
fury depleted,
and
the sun will send
calm
breezes soon;
hold
fast your course
while
love recovers
its
clement force.
49. Drowning
The
weight upon my soul
seems
to grow as if alive,
a
cancer made of lead
that
dares me to survive;
drowning
in the waters
from
which I once arose,
temptation
to surrender,
go
with the ocean’s flow,
and
set aside the sorrows
that
leave me with no tears,
set
aside the anger,
and
set aside the fears,
not
struggle any longer
against
the call of Fate,
to
know that peace will come –
and
yet to hesitate:
perhaps
time still exists,
enough
to heal my heart,
so
I no longer founder,
nor
hasten to depart.
50. Drowning
in Silence
The
weight upon her tongue,
invisible
anchor,
holds
her in the silence
of
the sea at dusk;
those
who yearn to comfort
raise
black sheets in silence,
shut
out from her sorrow
as
if intruding.
The
tears of Niobe,
punishment
for speaking,
perhaps
provide warning
to
sail in silence;
muted
by crushing waves,
she
retreats into depths
beyond
the reach of ears,
drowning
in silence.
51. Easter Song
He cast his line into the sea
51. Easter Song
He cast his line into the sea
just
as the sun lit up the sky,
alone
within the tranquil waves,
with
no alarm at clouds on high.
The
waters yielded to his rod
as
if he were a welcome friend,
and
not a solitary man
who
would not stand with them again.
Each
cast brought bounty to his hand,
enough
to feed the hungry poor
who
took no pleasure from the sea,
but
only feared its savage roar.
And
once the catch was large enough
the
fisher turned to other goals –
he
put away his rod and line,
then
gave himself to save their souls.
52. Enchanted Place
I thought I saw the stars
cavorting in the sky,
what joyful light arose
from waltzes danced on high;
I thought I saw the sea
relaxed in peaceful bliss,
reaching to the shoreline
as if with tender kiss.
I though the world was mine
with happiness unbound,
with painted clouds aloft
and flowers on the ground;
all this and more came here,
to this enchanted place,
for, as I looked around,
I thought I saw your face.
53. Endless Rain
Rain pounds the roof,
lashes the trees
and crushes flowers
like paper toys;
it never stops,
its rage eternal
and implacable,
an elemental force
beyond my ken.
I walk amid the storm,
let it surround me;
in the water at my feet
I see only myself,
my weary expression
echoing the gloom
that pervades everything.
My eyes beg for the sun,
for one day with no rain.
54. Enigmatic Mode
I am an enigma even to myself,
my mind so often a cauldron
filled with roiling emotions,
out of control, sometimes,
feeling alone, so many times,
even in the embrace of love.
The winter child, fair of face
but hiding such painful scars,
always reaching out for love,
never believing it was hers already.
Yet, even when I lose myself
in the black reaches of my soul,
I feel the coming of the light
to rescue me, to pull me back.
I remain an enigma to be solved,
but know I exist for some reason.
55. Even in Silence
Love exists without words,
even in silence my heart speaks
to you of a bond everlasting,
a tie that cannot be broken;
Love exists even in darkness
when the soul despairs,
it carries a torch to light
your way back to sunshine.
Love exists beyond reason,
an elemental force alive within,
a passionate faith that affirms
we are never completely alone;
Love exists beyond boundaries,
even should we never touch
my love for you will remain,
reaching out to dry your tears.
56. Faith
Old-fashioned, out of tune
with these modern times –
you say faith is false,
that God departed long ago,
if He ever existed.
But look at the stars,
see galaxies adrift
in an unending cosmos:
how does this exist,
why does this exist?
Physics, you say, and
smile at my naivete,
a patronizing glance;
God, I say, and regret
your loss of faith,
for when I am lost,
I look at the heavens
and find loving grace,
mercy most pure, and,
above all, forgiveness.
57. Fantasy
All she ever wanted was to belong,
to find her place like the rest,
not to look through windows closed
to keep her outside and alone.
But nothing ever seemed to work,
no word she spoke, no deed she did
could drive away the hollowness
she felt consume her lonely soul.
Condemned to her dark solitude,
she took refuge in bright fantasy,
imagining a world without hurt
where those like her could live;
but soon the fantasy claimed her,
no longer did she seek acceptance,
but lost herself in magic dreams,
and dreamt that she was loved.
58. Far Away
Far from the sea
but close in my heart,
distance irrelevant
when love exists;
my mind reaches out,
traces your footsteps
on far away soil,
follows your path.
I walk beside you
in rain and darkness,
guarding my guardian
against the night;
two pilgrims in life,
on roads now apart
but soon to unite –
for love exists.
59. Far from Home
A dark Winter day:
a far away look
in your eyes
as a land calls,
sings your name
in the rising wind;
your soul remains
on the vast prairie,
under a sky clear
and nurturing
majestic hawks
that soar so free.
Unbound you are
in this ancestral land,
released from fog
and endless cloud;
soon to return
and walk the soil,
feel her sunlight
embrace you,
touch the earth
with a spirit
that soars here,
among the hawks.
60. Fighting the Wind
Present but untouchable,
near but unreachable –
I am fighting the wind
slamming hard into me
with the force of a gale,
ever pushing me back
where I have no wish to be.
I can only rage in return,
desperate to end the combat
even if I must perish.
I grow tired of the battle
and offer up my paltry arms,
no longer the brave Viking.
In the eye of the storm
beckons an oasis of calm:
it is there I must go,
leaving the wind to others
more courageous than I.
61. Fire in the Sky
A pulsing beacon calls me back,
warning me of rocks near by
where ancient sailors met their fate,
where ruins of rotting ships still lie.
Will I reach my home this starless night,
escape the danger stalking me,
steer my boat to friendly shores,
not fall a victim to the Sea?
My dreams depend upon this light,
my life held in its weathered hand,
one final run against the wind,
to beach my craft upon the land.
I was not meant to stray so far,
a task for one more skilled than I,
a captain bold, in a ship well built --
how I watch that fire in the sky.
62. Flying
Feeling free,
wind lifts me up,
high above sorrow,
high above hurt;
the clouds below
seem small now,
unable to storm
upon my soul.
Feeling alive,
love lifts me up,
far from anger,
far from hatred;
my heart is filled
with sunlight,
cares cast aside:
at last I am flying.
63. For D.
64. Forever Reaching Out
Forever reaching out,
peninsula to sea,
a mutual embrace
to set each other free;
no boundaries exist
as waves regain the shore,
elemental passion
asunder nevermore.
Forever reaching out
I took his hand in mine,
the son of distant land
adorned with spruce and pine,
and I the ocean child
found love upon my shore,
peninsula and sea
asunder nevermore.
65. For Sam
Life imitates the honey bee:
it brings much sweetness
as well as many painful stings,
and, at times, the grief of life
overshadows all happiness.
Bruised by such moments,
look far ahead: you will see
love and peace awaiting you,
arms open wide in embrace.
The passage will never be easy,
and the wounds will ever exist,
but we need that hurt inside
to remind us we are human,
not perfect, not without sin,
but always moving forward,
to explore being human.
66. Friendly Fire
Friendly fire still burns,
inflicts even deeper wounds
than those of the enemy;
you never see it coming,
never think to look that way,
where safety ought to lie.
Yet those who send this fire
do so in ignorance, unaware,
oblivious to your presence
on a common battlefield.
We are taught to forgive
those who know not what they do,
yet can forgiveness heal
the jagged wounds you bear?
Friendly fire: ironic, savage,
masking the brutal harm done
by those who should know better;
tonight I think of your pain,
pray that whatever Power exists
will mercifully bring you sleep.
67. Friends and Lovers
You entered my life gently,
a single act of kindness
revealing the soul that made us
friends.
Trusting you with my dreams,
I also exposed my sorrows,
secure that we would always be
friends.
Yet now we share another love:
selfless, eager to embrace
all that life may bring us as
lovers.
A sweet transition: friendship
blooming into love most pure,
a joining of the spirit in
lovers.
The passing years make clear
how much of me exists in you,
how we share a bond unique:
friends and lovers.
68. Garda
The waters of Lake Garda,
Verona’s cobbled lanes –
all have known Catullus,
live onward in his fame;
the modest country villa
that sheltered him from Rome,
what poems of love he wrote
at peace within his home.
A pilgrim comes unbidden
to share the poet’s cure,
with love to celebrate,
and hatred to endure;
come, waters of Lake Garda,
receive this newfound guest,
think back upon Catullus
and grant me equal rest.
69. Gentle Man
Gentle man with soaring dreams,
too shy and innocent to know
the heavy clouds that gather
to scoff at those below,
the mountains in the distance
to bar the path you choose,
the spinning wheel of Life
with so many doomed to lose
the hopes they nourished once,
the wagers made in trust
that fair fortune lay ahead
beyond their hometown dust.
Gentle man, you now can see
that limits are imposed,
how for every door ajar,
many more are bolted closed;
yet even with diminished dreams
you walk your rock strewn road,
still intent to lend your hand
to those with harsher loads,
to offer love to one like me,
in fear to walk alone –
gentle man with broken dreams,
how mighty have you grown.
70. Ghost Ship
Far out on the sea
and heading for home
a stately tall ship
had no more to roam;
her journey was over,
the winds had been kind,
no storms came along
to burden her mind.
The halcyon days
had given her wings,
“the fastest of ships”
her figurehead sings;
but empty the docks
and empty the shore,
no sign of the men
who lived there before;
no voices called out
to welcome her back,
silence embraced her –
the day became black.
Time ceased to exist,
a ghost she became,
invisible now,
a ship with no name;
but once in a while,
when the hour is late,
some say they see her
ablaze in the strait.
71. Gift from Afar
A package came the other day,
a priceless treasure you had found
and kindly thought to send along
to help my spirit soar unbound.
I listened to the heavenly choir
discovered by your loving hand,
their voices full of hope and faith
to help my struggling soul now stand
and sense the gracious peace of God
as it penetrates deep within,
so quick to heal the wounds we bear,
removing scars of ancient sin.
I pray such peace may now descend
upon that spirit of your own,
that you may know the greatest joys
that any man has ever known.
72. Go Gentle
A life not measured in years
brings us together this day,
in celebration of a love
ever in our hearts to stay,
for Time can never erase
the mark of a generous soul,
her laughter making us smile,
and her love making us whole.
Memories etched upon our hearts
bring comfort to our grieving,
and in the days ahead we know
her love is never leaving,
but will remain with us forever,
a beacon shining with the light
created by the love she gave --
go gentle into that good night.
73. Going Home
Going home –
just a journey
to another place,
back in time,
a blurred image.
Far distant days
you barely remember,
yet the spirit calls,
entices you back,
promising…what?
To remake the past,
to fix the broken
or mend a tear
that split your soul
when you were young?
Going home –
you never really do,
simply a visitor
in search of something
lost long ago.
74. Guardian
No arrows pierce my flesh,
no stones can bring me pain,
I dread no more the chill
that comes from endless rain.
Clouds give way to sunlight,
wild waves submit to calm,
no blast of wind remains
to bring my soul to harm.
Impervious I am,
a fortress beyond reach,
with walls of granite stone
no enemy can breach.
In courage I stand firm,
reject the cloak of fear,
for nothing can intrude
as long as you are near.
75. Guardian Angels
Dark clouds overwhelmed me,
and I sank, stone-like, into them,
hoping to lose myself, to hide
from the madness raging within,
to escape an angry world.
But you gently pulled me back,
embracing me with a love
that would not let me fall.
Guardian angels must exist:
who else could have led me
into your distant worlds,
brought me to a special place
where caring hands reached out
and strangers drove the mists away.
76. Hands Across the Sea
The distance that divides us
vanishes in a second:
you are there, with me,
even if unseen.
No need of eyes to see the face,
nor ears to hear the voice:
our souls reach out
and connect, fuse into one.
A union once impossible:
stranded on our separate shores,
we could not have known
the power of this friendship.
Even should we never meet,
I am stronger for your presence,
I am wiser for your counsel,
and I am forever grateful.
77. Hard Drive Supernova
My brain begins to reel,
causing me to stagger,
lights are flashing
all over my hard drive;
critical failure,
illegal command –
the program will terminate.
Neurons explode,
going supernova,
the universe ceases to exist,
gravity and dark matter
combining to crush me.
I can compute no longer,
binary forms fade,
numbers dancing away,
light into darkness;
I must shut down,
try to reboot again.
78. Holiday Blue
A circle of happiness:
within, laughter and smiles,
protected by defensive walls
from darkness and gloom;
eat and be merry:
all is well in the world.
Outside, tears and sorrow
in those unable to enter
the citadels of mirth.
I stand on the battlement,
a foot in each camp,
never fully within
and never fully without;
vicarious joy in my heart
fails to dismiss
the emptiness I feel.
I shall eat and be merry,
partake of the fellowship,
then quickly retreat
to the enemy ranks.
79. Horizon
The horizon stretches forever,
like the vastness of creation;
there is space here to take wing
and soar into the dome of heaven.
So small I feel set beside this land,
insignificant and invisible,
yet also akin to these surroundings,
breathing in the scent of the prairie.
Far from the sea that gave me birth,
I roam upon the spreading plains
that once sustained a proud people
who did not know my ocean home;
we are earth and water now combined,
you and I, as we walk on hallowed ground,
pilgrims on a quest for serenity,
the peace pervading this big sky.
80. Howling Rage
She sits, like the Pythia,
at a strange oracle,
listening to voices
emanating from a chasm;
she hears their howls of pain,
desperation, lack of hope,
their need to be loved,
their need to be heard;
these voices assault her,
she begins to reach out
but finds only thin vapour,
nothing of substance.
Like the ancient priestess,
she tries to breathe in,
to inhale the torment
before it disperses;
then mystic speech comes,
promising salvation,
promising to end the wounds
they inflict on themselves --
will they hear her cries,
these voices of rage,
and see that love begins
only by loving themselves?
81. Hydra
The nine-headed serpent slithers
its way to wherever you are,
no path lies free from its poison,
a venom that travels so far
that you can never escape it
or end its flow with a dagger –
cut off one head and two others
seek you out with crude swagger.
Far better then to stand stalwart,
armed with a torch held on high,
taunting the creature from Hades
and spitting a curse in its eyes;
burn off each head as it hovers,
seal up the wound before birth,
ignore the false tears it will shed –
such evil belongs in the earth.
82. Ice Bound
How you danced in sunlight
upon the waters of the bay
when clearing skies sent steady winds
to speed you on your way,
to banish all oppressive clouds
and set your gliding spirit free,
while rain descended elsewhere
so you could dance with me.
But summer flew too quickly
and our dancing time is done,
for you must leave your moorings
till dark Winter’s ice has gone;
your mast lies still upon the shore,
your sails are hung to dry,
I gaze upon your naked self
and my soul begins to cry.
Another summer come and gone,
its presence all too brief,
just hiding in the heavens
like a slyly smirking thief,
and as I stow your sheets away,
deep sadness steals my heart
at the lonely months ahead
when I must dance apart.
83. Idyl
Carry me where the Sun glows warm,
where fields are bathed in vivid green,
and let me place my wind-swept head
by graceful flowers never seen,
whose vibrant rainbow-coloured buds
will sparkle in the morning light,
where I can lay my body down
and find sweet dreams to last the night.
Let my spirit soar to meadows
with crystal waters flowing by,
let me climb a lofty mountain
and feel my hand grasp at the sky;
take me far from crimson battles,
my soul so burdened by their weight,
grant me the gift of peaceful life,
a world without the sting of hate.
Or do I fool myself to dream
of lands where peace rules over all,
where people pass their days in joy,
and never hear war’s clarion call?
I pray to any gods there are
that I may find the calm I seek,
and feel the healing force of love
before my spirit falls too weak.
84. If Only
If only I could dry your tears,
tears that flow so endlessly,
tears that create rivers of pain
and slowly merge into the sea.
If only I could make you smile,
a smile to banish every fear,
a smile to endure for all of time,
and give you strength when death is near.
If only I could hold you close
and never let you go away,
if only I could do all this
I would not cry with you today.
85. In Darkness
The flames flared up again last night,
the dragon bellowed in his lair
as if aroused from hungry sleep
and knowing I would still be there;
I felt his breath upon my flesh
and heard the song he always sang:
“come dance with me this evening fair,
embrace the rapture of my fang,”
but as I fought against his might,
another voice called out to me,
a softer song just barely heard
with solemn vows to set me free,
and arms reached out to hold me close,
unsinged by terrors born of flame,
in darkness beating back the beast
by simply whispering my name.
86. In Friendship
A friend is a gift
you never expected,
a warming smile
when life seems cold,
a sparkling word
to light the dark,
a soft touching
of your heart.
Treasure your friends:
they will smile
with you,
they will cry
with you,
they will understand
what you
say and do
when no one else can.
Good friends are rare,
precious gems
you would not trade
for bags of gold,
precious souls
you would never hurt.
Reach out to them
in their sorrow,
make them smile again.
87. In Gratitude
Perhaps she travels far afield
just to see what lies beyond,
to break the ties that keep her where
she never feels that she belongs;
some Shangri-La must lie ahead
where misfits may discover peace,
where tranquil rivers whisper
promises of sweet release.
The anchor stone around her soul
assumes an overwhelming weight,
and she must plan a quick escape
lest she succumb to angry fate;
so ever on a pilgrimage
she wends her way from place to place,
but looking back along the road,
she thanks you for your gift of grace.
88. In Her Eyes (M.R.)
In her eyes I see the sorrow
over things that never were,
the long held dreams abandoned,
their wonders ever lost to her,
the unknown path she’d chosen
as familiar roads were scorned,
so long a journey now complete,
the past a remnant to be mourned.
In her eyes I see reflection,
the counting up of years gone by,
the ledger given every soul
when final days are drawing nigh,
and as I gaze upon her face,
at scars so wide and deeply hewn,
I pray that love will ease the pain
of one whose dying came too soon.
89. In Solitude, 1
In solitude I find release,
embrace its presence as a gift,
the balm to banish baneful words
that cannot cross my silent rift;
to stand apart from warriors
who take delight in victory,
who always think the wrongs they do
escape the eyes of history.
In solitude I leave behind
the tattered remnants of my soul,
unwilling to become a part
of hydras with a vengeful goal,
who dare to speak of tolerance
as long as they can hold the reigns,
and use the power granted them
to garner only selfish gains.
In solitude I hear the sounds
of creatures with no wealth to seek,
and faithful to Socratic sight
I take my place among the meek.
90. In Solitude, 2
A phantom in the distance,
far away from prying eyes,
I contemplate the kindness
of these silent midnight skies,
of stars that never wonder
who I am or what I do,
who never proffer judgement
born of words that are untrue.
A pilgrim on a journey,
a quest for preservation,
to save my soul from arrows
that strike with condemnation,
I will not ask forgiveness
for words I never uttered,
free in peace among the pines
that keep my presence shuttered.
Do not come to seek me out,
but listen to the winter winds,
my words will ride their currents
till a gentler time begins;
but now I curse raw anger,
hatred that demands I flee
to heal my wounds in darkness,
in shadows of society.
91. In the Dark
Fire-bringer Prometheus,
chained to his distant crag,
enduring endless torment
for the clever gift of flame --
the ashes in the woodstove
were once living poems,
the fire of Prometheus
also brings oblivion.
The good and the bad:
we spend our lives judging,
employing the balance
in our own fiery minds;
that which is deemed unfit,
fails to meet our standards,
we consign to destruction,
to eternal damnation by fire.
I give these pieces of my soul
to the god of light and fire,
I surrender to Prometheus
and sit alone, in the dark.
92. In the Shadow
In the shadow of my life
you stand so strong,
never wavering,
hands outstretched,
a heart so filled with love
that cascades over me,
cleansing my dark-struck soul.
You bring me light
and give me hope,
expecting nothing in return;
you are the other,
never standing in the spotlight,
never winning applause.
Yet this matters not to you:
in the shadow of my life
you play your loving part
in joy, enduring
pain you could avoid,
suffering for me.
Love is the bond:
all that you have given me,
selfless and caring –
I exist only because
you stand in the shadow.
93. Invisible Presence
A storm without warning
descended in anger,
and all on the ocean
fell prey to a danger
that never relented,
and never surrendered,
till waves carried flotsam
and all dreams had ended.
But as I was drowning
in this realm far from land,
an invisible presence,
with unwavering hand,
took hold of my spirit
with no hesitation,
at dawn I awoke at
the grace of salvation.
94. Islands of my Heart
Cradled on the waves,
two children of ocean
sing a siren song
I cannot resist,
luring me to barren rocks
and fields in flowers,
alike and yet so different,
their calls persist.
To choose impossible:
I plant my heart in both,
sharing my summer dreams
in equal measure,
hoping each will understand
the divided love I feel,
and grant my soul to dance
among such treasure.
95. January Faith
She glanced upon the year just passed
in wonder at the paths she chose,
a turning here, a detour there,
and how it ended she now knows;
perhaps another choice at times,
perhaps another word or two –
the past seems like a game of chance:
the die is cast by what you do.
Regret and satisfaction both
will mark the dawn of this new year,
with lessons learned, and wisdom gained
to counter any new born fear;
she knows the past cannot be changed,
it follows like a spectral wraith --
but if gazing back takes courage,
to look ahead engenders faith.
52. Enchanted Place
I thought I saw the stars
cavorting in the sky,
what joyful light arose
from waltzes danced on high;
I thought I saw the sea
relaxed in peaceful bliss,
reaching to the shoreline
as if with tender kiss.
I though the world was mine
with happiness unbound,
with painted clouds aloft
and flowers on the ground;
all this and more came here,
to this enchanted place,
for, as I looked around,
I thought I saw your face.
53. Endless Rain
Rain pounds the roof,
lashes the trees
and crushes flowers
like paper toys;
it never stops,
its rage eternal
and implacable,
an elemental force
beyond my ken.
I walk amid the storm,
let it surround me;
in the water at my feet
I see only myself,
my weary expression
echoing the gloom
that pervades everything.
My eyes beg for the sun,
for one day with no rain.
54. Enigmatic Mode
I am an enigma even to myself,
my mind so often a cauldron
filled with roiling emotions,
out of control, sometimes,
feeling alone, so many times,
even in the embrace of love.
The winter child, fair of face
but hiding such painful scars,
always reaching out for love,
never believing it was hers already.
Yet, even when I lose myself
in the black reaches of my soul,
I feel the coming of the light
to rescue me, to pull me back.
I remain an enigma to be solved,
but know I exist for some reason.
55. Even in Silence
Love exists without words,
even in silence my heart speaks
to you of a bond everlasting,
a tie that cannot be broken;
Love exists even in darkness
when the soul despairs,
it carries a torch to light
your way back to sunshine.
Love exists beyond reason,
an elemental force alive within,
a passionate faith that affirms
we are never completely alone;
Love exists beyond boundaries,
even should we never touch
my love for you will remain,
reaching out to dry your tears.
56. Faith
Old-fashioned, out of tune
with these modern times –
you say faith is false,
that God departed long ago,
if He ever existed.
But look at the stars,
see galaxies adrift
in an unending cosmos:
how does this exist,
why does this exist?
Physics, you say, and
smile at my naivete,
a patronizing glance;
God, I say, and regret
your loss of faith,
for when I am lost,
I look at the heavens
and find loving grace,
mercy most pure, and,
above all, forgiveness.
57. Fantasy
All she ever wanted was to belong,
to find her place like the rest,
not to look through windows closed
to keep her outside and alone.
But nothing ever seemed to work,
no word she spoke, no deed she did
could drive away the hollowness
she felt consume her lonely soul.
Condemned to her dark solitude,
she took refuge in bright fantasy,
imagining a world without hurt
where those like her could live;
but soon the fantasy claimed her,
no longer did she seek acceptance,
but lost herself in magic dreams,
and dreamt that she was loved.
58. Far Away
Far from the sea
but close in my heart,
distance irrelevant
when love exists;
my mind reaches out,
traces your footsteps
on far away soil,
follows your path.
I walk beside you
in rain and darkness,
guarding my guardian
against the night;
two pilgrims in life,
on roads now apart
but soon to unite –
for love exists.
59. Far from Home
A dark Winter day:
a far away look
in your eyes
as a land calls,
sings your name
in the rising wind;
your soul remains
on the vast prairie,
under a sky clear
and nurturing
majestic hawks
that soar so free.
Unbound you are
in this ancestral land,
released from fog
and endless cloud;
soon to return
and walk the soil,
feel her sunlight
embrace you,
touch the earth
with a spirit
that soars here,
among the hawks.
60. Fighting the Wind
Present but untouchable,
near but unreachable –
I am fighting the wind
slamming hard into me
with the force of a gale,
ever pushing me back
where I have no wish to be.
I can only rage in return,
desperate to end the combat
even if I must perish.
I grow tired of the battle
and offer up my paltry arms,
no longer the brave Viking.
In the eye of the storm
beckons an oasis of calm:
it is there I must go,
leaving the wind to others
more courageous than I.
61. Fire in the Sky
A pulsing beacon calls me back,
warning me of rocks near by
where ancient sailors met their fate,
where ruins of rotting ships still lie.
Will I reach my home this starless night,
escape the danger stalking me,
steer my boat to friendly shores,
not fall a victim to the Sea?
My dreams depend upon this light,
my life held in its weathered hand,
one final run against the wind,
to beach my craft upon the land.
I was not meant to stray so far,
a task for one more skilled than I,
a captain bold, in a ship well built --
how I watch that fire in the sky.
62. Flying
Feeling free,
wind lifts me up,
high above sorrow,
high above hurt;
the clouds below
seem small now,
unable to storm
upon my soul.
Feeling alive,
love lifts me up,
far from anger,
far from hatred;
my heart is filled
with sunlight,
cares cast aside:
at last I am flying.
63. For D.
Deep dark eyes, smiling at me with love,
knowing the torment, understanding
the secret pain, never wavering in fear.
The gentle touch of your embrace,
the soft kiss, the hand touching mine:
the poet struggles in vain for words
to offer you, words to express the love,
words that mean nothing without the love
that bears them to this empty page.
Love: how I once thought love elusive,
an autumn leaf adrift upon the northern wind,
flying far across meadows, beyond mountains,
not to be grasped by my trembling hand;
yet you saw me as I am and did not hesitate
to catch the leaf and bring it safely to me.
The bond we forged has grown more powerful
as the years rush by, years silently heralding
what must come soon: the Leaving –
not what we wish, but what must be.
Long ago, the haggard Fates determined
my thread was short, easily broken,
unable to long endure the pain of life;
still you did not doubt, did not turn away
to seek a safer kind of love, less hurtful.
My heart and yours forever one:
even Death will bow before this love,
knowing that two souls are joined forever,
destined to ride the autumn winds.
64. Forever Reaching Out
Forever reaching out,
peninsula to sea,
a mutual embrace
to set each other free;
no boundaries exist
as waves regain the shore,
elemental passion
asunder nevermore.
Forever reaching out
I took his hand in mine,
the son of distant land
adorned with spruce and pine,
and I the ocean child
found love upon my shore,
peninsula and sea
asunder nevermore.
65. For Sam
Life imitates the honey bee:
it brings much sweetness
as well as many painful stings,
and, at times, the grief of life
overshadows all happiness.
Bruised by such moments,
look far ahead: you will see
love and peace awaiting you,
arms open wide in embrace.
The passage will never be easy,
and the wounds will ever exist,
but we need that hurt inside
to remind us we are human,
not perfect, not without sin,
but always moving forward,
to explore being human.
66. Friendly Fire
Friendly fire still burns,
inflicts even deeper wounds
than those of the enemy;
you never see it coming,
never think to look that way,
where safety ought to lie.
Yet those who send this fire
do so in ignorance, unaware,
oblivious to your presence
on a common battlefield.
We are taught to forgive
those who know not what they do,
yet can forgiveness heal
the jagged wounds you bear?
Friendly fire: ironic, savage,
masking the brutal harm done
by those who should know better;
tonight I think of your pain,
pray that whatever Power exists
will mercifully bring you sleep.
67. Friends and Lovers
You entered my life gently,
a single act of kindness
revealing the soul that made us
friends.
Trusting you with my dreams,
I also exposed my sorrows,
secure that we would always be
friends.
Yet now we share another love:
selfless, eager to embrace
all that life may bring us as
lovers.
A sweet transition: friendship
blooming into love most pure,
a joining of the spirit in
lovers.
The passing years make clear
how much of me exists in you,
how we share a bond unique:
friends and lovers.
68. Garda
The waters of Lake Garda,
Verona’s cobbled lanes –
all have known Catullus,
live onward in his fame;
the modest country villa
that sheltered him from Rome,
what poems of love he wrote
at peace within his home.
A pilgrim comes unbidden
to share the poet’s cure,
with love to celebrate,
and hatred to endure;
come, waters of Lake Garda,
receive this newfound guest,
think back upon Catullus
and grant me equal rest.
69. Gentle Man
Gentle man with soaring dreams,
too shy and innocent to know
the heavy clouds that gather
to scoff at those below,
the mountains in the distance
to bar the path you choose,
the spinning wheel of Life
with so many doomed to lose
the hopes they nourished once,
the wagers made in trust
that fair fortune lay ahead
beyond their hometown dust.
Gentle man, you now can see
that limits are imposed,
how for every door ajar,
many more are bolted closed;
yet even with diminished dreams
you walk your rock strewn road,
still intent to lend your hand
to those with harsher loads,
to offer love to one like me,
in fear to walk alone –
gentle man with broken dreams,
how mighty have you grown.
70. Ghost Ship
Far out on the sea
and heading for home
a stately tall ship
had no more to roam;
her journey was over,
the winds had been kind,
no storms came along
to burden her mind.
The halcyon days
had given her wings,
“the fastest of ships”
her figurehead sings;
but empty the docks
and empty the shore,
no sign of the men
who lived there before;
no voices called out
to welcome her back,
silence embraced her –
the day became black.
Time ceased to exist,
a ghost she became,
invisible now,
a ship with no name;
but once in a while,
when the hour is late,
some say they see her
ablaze in the strait.
71. Gift from Afar
A package came the other day,
a priceless treasure you had found
and kindly thought to send along
to help my spirit soar unbound.
I listened to the heavenly choir
discovered by your loving hand,
their voices full of hope and faith
to help my struggling soul now stand
and sense the gracious peace of God
as it penetrates deep within,
so quick to heal the wounds we bear,
removing scars of ancient sin.
I pray such peace may now descend
upon that spirit of your own,
that you may know the greatest joys
that any man has ever known.
72. Go Gentle
A life not measured in years
brings us together this day,
in celebration of a love
ever in our hearts to stay,
for Time can never erase
the mark of a generous soul,
her laughter making us smile,
and her love making us whole.
Memories etched upon our hearts
bring comfort to our grieving,
and in the days ahead we know
her love is never leaving,
but will remain with us forever,
a beacon shining with the light
created by the love she gave --
go gentle into that good night.
73. Going Home
Going home –
just a journey
to another place,
back in time,
a blurred image.
Far distant days
you barely remember,
yet the spirit calls,
entices you back,
promising…what?
To remake the past,
to fix the broken
or mend a tear
that split your soul
when you were young?
Going home –
you never really do,
simply a visitor
in search of something
lost long ago.
74. Guardian
No arrows pierce my flesh,
no stones can bring me pain,
I dread no more the chill
that comes from endless rain.
Clouds give way to sunlight,
wild waves submit to calm,
no blast of wind remains
to bring my soul to harm.
Impervious I am,
a fortress beyond reach,
with walls of granite stone
no enemy can breach.
In courage I stand firm,
reject the cloak of fear,
for nothing can intrude
as long as you are near.
75. Guardian Angels
Dark clouds overwhelmed me,
and I sank, stone-like, into them,
hoping to lose myself, to hide
from the madness raging within,
to escape an angry world.
But you gently pulled me back,
embracing me with a love
that would not let me fall.
Guardian angels must exist:
who else could have led me
into your distant worlds,
brought me to a special place
where caring hands reached out
and strangers drove the mists away.
76. Hands Across the Sea
The distance that divides us
vanishes in a second:
you are there, with me,
even if unseen.
No need of eyes to see the face,
nor ears to hear the voice:
our souls reach out
and connect, fuse into one.
A union once impossible:
stranded on our separate shores,
we could not have known
the power of this friendship.
Even should we never meet,
I am stronger for your presence,
I am wiser for your counsel,
and I am forever grateful.
77. Hard Drive Supernova
My brain begins to reel,
causing me to stagger,
lights are flashing
all over my hard drive;
critical failure,
illegal command –
the program will terminate.
Neurons explode,
going supernova,
the universe ceases to exist,
gravity and dark matter
combining to crush me.
I can compute no longer,
binary forms fade,
numbers dancing away,
light into darkness;
I must shut down,
try to reboot again.
78. Holiday Blue
A circle of happiness:
within, laughter and smiles,
protected by defensive walls
from darkness and gloom;
eat and be merry:
all is well in the world.
Outside, tears and sorrow
in those unable to enter
the citadels of mirth.
I stand on the battlement,
a foot in each camp,
never fully within
and never fully without;
vicarious joy in my heart
fails to dismiss
the emptiness I feel.
I shall eat and be merry,
partake of the fellowship,
then quickly retreat
to the enemy ranks.
79. Horizon
The horizon stretches forever,
like the vastness of creation;
there is space here to take wing
and soar into the dome of heaven.
So small I feel set beside this land,
insignificant and invisible,
yet also akin to these surroundings,
breathing in the scent of the prairie.
Far from the sea that gave me birth,
I roam upon the spreading plains
that once sustained a proud people
who did not know my ocean home;
we are earth and water now combined,
you and I, as we walk on hallowed ground,
pilgrims on a quest for serenity,
the peace pervading this big sky.
80. Howling Rage
She sits, like the Pythia,
at a strange oracle,
listening to voices
emanating from a chasm;
she hears their howls of pain,
desperation, lack of hope,
their need to be loved,
their need to be heard;
these voices assault her,
she begins to reach out
but finds only thin vapour,
nothing of substance.
Like the ancient priestess,
she tries to breathe in,
to inhale the torment
before it disperses;
then mystic speech comes,
promising salvation,
promising to end the wounds
they inflict on themselves --
will they hear her cries,
these voices of rage,
and see that love begins
only by loving themselves?
81. Hydra
The nine-headed serpent slithers
its way to wherever you are,
no path lies free from its poison,
a venom that travels so far
that you can never escape it
or end its flow with a dagger –
cut off one head and two others
seek you out with crude swagger.
Far better then to stand stalwart,
armed with a torch held on high,
taunting the creature from Hades
and spitting a curse in its eyes;
burn off each head as it hovers,
seal up the wound before birth,
ignore the false tears it will shed –
such evil belongs in the earth.
82. Ice Bound
How you danced in sunlight
upon the waters of the bay
when clearing skies sent steady winds
to speed you on your way,
to banish all oppressive clouds
and set your gliding spirit free,
while rain descended elsewhere
so you could dance with me.
But summer flew too quickly
and our dancing time is done,
for you must leave your moorings
till dark Winter’s ice has gone;
your mast lies still upon the shore,
your sails are hung to dry,
I gaze upon your naked self
and my soul begins to cry.
Another summer come and gone,
its presence all too brief,
just hiding in the heavens
like a slyly smirking thief,
and as I stow your sheets away,
deep sadness steals my heart
at the lonely months ahead
when I must dance apart.
83. Idyl
Carry me where the Sun glows warm,
where fields are bathed in vivid green,
and let me place my wind-swept head
by graceful flowers never seen,
whose vibrant rainbow-coloured buds
will sparkle in the morning light,
where I can lay my body down
and find sweet dreams to last the night.
Let my spirit soar to meadows
with crystal waters flowing by,
let me climb a lofty mountain
and feel my hand grasp at the sky;
take me far from crimson battles,
my soul so burdened by their weight,
grant me the gift of peaceful life,
a world without the sting of hate.
Or do I fool myself to dream
of lands where peace rules over all,
where people pass their days in joy,
and never hear war’s clarion call?
I pray to any gods there are
that I may find the calm I seek,
and feel the healing force of love
before my spirit falls too weak.
84. If Only
If only I could dry your tears,
tears that flow so endlessly,
tears that create rivers of pain
and slowly merge into the sea.
If only I could make you smile,
a smile to banish every fear,
a smile to endure for all of time,
and give you strength when death is near.
If only I could hold you close
and never let you go away,
if only I could do all this
I would not cry with you today.
85. In Darkness
The flames flared up again last night,
the dragon bellowed in his lair
as if aroused from hungry sleep
and knowing I would still be there;
I felt his breath upon my flesh
and heard the song he always sang:
“come dance with me this evening fair,
embrace the rapture of my fang,”
but as I fought against his might,
another voice called out to me,
a softer song just barely heard
with solemn vows to set me free,
and arms reached out to hold me close,
unsinged by terrors born of flame,
in darkness beating back the beast
by simply whispering my name.
86. In Friendship
A friend is a gift
you never expected,
a warming smile
when life seems cold,
a sparkling word
to light the dark,
a soft touching
of your heart.
Treasure your friends:
they will smile
with you,
they will cry
with you,
they will understand
what you
say and do
when no one else can.
Good friends are rare,
precious gems
you would not trade
for bags of gold,
precious souls
you would never hurt.
Reach out to them
in their sorrow,
make them smile again.
87. In Gratitude
Perhaps she travels far afield
just to see what lies beyond,
to break the ties that keep her where
she never feels that she belongs;
some Shangri-La must lie ahead
where misfits may discover peace,
where tranquil rivers whisper
promises of sweet release.
The anchor stone around her soul
assumes an overwhelming weight,
and she must plan a quick escape
lest she succumb to angry fate;
so ever on a pilgrimage
she wends her way from place to place,
but looking back along the road,
she thanks you for your gift of grace.
88. In Her Eyes (M.R.)
In her eyes I see the sorrow
over things that never were,
the long held dreams abandoned,
their wonders ever lost to her,
the unknown path she’d chosen
as familiar roads were scorned,
so long a journey now complete,
the past a remnant to be mourned.
In her eyes I see reflection,
the counting up of years gone by,
the ledger given every soul
when final days are drawing nigh,
and as I gaze upon her face,
at scars so wide and deeply hewn,
I pray that love will ease the pain
of one whose dying came too soon.
89. In Solitude, 1
In solitude I find release,
embrace its presence as a gift,
the balm to banish baneful words
that cannot cross my silent rift;
to stand apart from warriors
who take delight in victory,
who always think the wrongs they do
escape the eyes of history.
In solitude I leave behind
the tattered remnants of my soul,
unwilling to become a part
of hydras with a vengeful goal,
who dare to speak of tolerance
as long as they can hold the reigns,
and use the power granted them
to garner only selfish gains.
In solitude I hear the sounds
of creatures with no wealth to seek,
and faithful to Socratic sight
I take my place among the meek.
90. In Solitude, 2
A phantom in the distance,
far away from prying eyes,
I contemplate the kindness
of these silent midnight skies,
of stars that never wonder
who I am or what I do,
who never proffer judgement
born of words that are untrue.
A pilgrim on a journey,
a quest for preservation,
to save my soul from arrows
that strike with condemnation,
I will not ask forgiveness
for words I never uttered,
free in peace among the pines
that keep my presence shuttered.
Do not come to seek me out,
but listen to the winter winds,
my words will ride their currents
till a gentler time begins;
but now I curse raw anger,
hatred that demands I flee
to heal my wounds in darkness,
in shadows of society.
91. In the Dark
Fire-bringer Prometheus,
chained to his distant crag,
enduring endless torment
for the clever gift of flame --
the ashes in the woodstove
were once living poems,
the fire of Prometheus
also brings oblivion.
The good and the bad:
we spend our lives judging,
employing the balance
in our own fiery minds;
that which is deemed unfit,
fails to meet our standards,
we consign to destruction,
to eternal damnation by fire.
I give these pieces of my soul
to the god of light and fire,
I surrender to Prometheus
and sit alone, in the dark.
92. In the Shadow
In the shadow of my life
you stand so strong,
never wavering,
hands outstretched,
a heart so filled with love
that cascades over me,
cleansing my dark-struck soul.
You bring me light
and give me hope,
expecting nothing in return;
you are the other,
never standing in the spotlight,
never winning applause.
Yet this matters not to you:
in the shadow of my life
you play your loving part
in joy, enduring
pain you could avoid,
suffering for me.
Love is the bond:
all that you have given me,
selfless and caring –
I exist only because
you stand in the shadow.
93. Invisible Presence
A storm without warning
descended in anger,
and all on the ocean
fell prey to a danger
that never relented,
and never surrendered,
till waves carried flotsam
and all dreams had ended.
But as I was drowning
in this realm far from land,
an invisible presence,
with unwavering hand,
took hold of my spirit
with no hesitation,
at dawn I awoke at
the grace of salvation.
94. Islands of my Heart
Cradled on the waves,
two children of ocean
sing a siren song
I cannot resist,
luring me to barren rocks
and fields in flowers,
alike and yet so different,
their calls persist.
To choose impossible:
I plant my heart in both,
sharing my summer dreams
in equal measure,
hoping each will understand
the divided love I feel,
and grant my soul to dance
among such treasure.
95. January Faith
She glanced upon the year just passed
in wonder at the paths she chose,
a turning here, a detour there,
and how it ended she now knows;
perhaps another choice at times,
perhaps another word or two –
the past seems like a game of chance:
the die is cast by what you do.
Regret and satisfaction both
will mark the dawn of this new year,
with lessons learned, and wisdom gained
to counter any new born fear;
she knows the past cannot be changed,
it follows like a spectral wraith --
but if gazing back takes courage,
to look ahead engenders faith.
No comments:
Post a Comment